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Book 7 Page 40

Alas poor Yorrick, I knew him well!

Note: This is set in a play context 


(Student) Alas poor Yorrick, I knew him well.


(Director) Ah, that’s not bad??

Now try and say it like you really mean it.


(Student in a boring tone) Alas poor Yorrick I knew him well.


(Director) O, no no, no no, no.

I want to hear the emphasis on ‘Yorrick.’

Remember, Yorrick was your closest friend and

you’re lamenting his passing.

Here give me the scull,

this is how it’s done!


(Director in a dramatic tone) Alas poor Yorrick! I knew him well.


(Student) Alas poor Yorrick ,I knew him well.


(Director) H—mm, it’s getting better.

We’re coming along.

Now see if you can put a bit of passion into the whole thing.


(Director) Remember it is so very very well, that you knew Yorrick.

There’s got to be a gut renching emphasis on how well you knew Yorrick.

(Although the poor bugger’s not very well at the moment, I must admit.)


(Director) Here give it another go.

But this time say it like you really really! mean it.


(Director) Remember that beautiful woman you saw in the park the other day?

Remember what you said to me

Now, take this scull and imagine this is her.

Ah come on, don’t look so sad.

We're only play acting, the skull’s plastic anyway.




(Director) Come on! take the scull; here she is, her name is "Yorrick, "

This is that beautiful woman you saw in the park?

Well imagine she’s dead now,

but you’ve got one last shot to tell her how you really feel.



(Director) You can do it! I know you can.

Just remember how excited you were, that’s all you have to do.

Concentrate on that day,

I believe in you.



(Director) Take a good deep breath and project it out from here.

Here have a look, here, deep in the solar plexus.

Imagine that your whole life is dependant on it.

And put everything you got into it.




(Student in a boring tone) Alas! poor Yorrick I knew him well.


(Director) H-m-m,

If that’s the best your gonna do

I suppose we'll just have to go with that,

otherwise we’ll be here all bloody day.


(Director) Now!

What’s the next line?


© Written by Dominic John Gill  23/10/99